New Tires and New Parenting Phase

You know those moments when life’s big insights hit you in the most unexpected places? That happened to me yesterday at Discount Tire. The tech examined all four tires on my Honda Odyssey and said, “Your tires are pretty worn; they’ve had a good ride but the tread’s almost gone. I highly recommend getting all new tires.” I smiled and said, “I totally understand!” I’m pretty sure the tech thought I was unusually enthusiastic in my response to his report. 

These tires tell a story that every parent sending their kid to college might relate to. My Odyssey has been through it all, daily school drop-off and pickups, rides to dance class, doctor’s appointment, our annual road trip to Palm Springs, SAT tests, and most recently a 500 mile drive up the California coast to drop my daughter off at UC Berkeley. Many of the miles on my car carry parenting memories and milestones.

Think about it: just like tire tread wears down over thousands of miles, we parents experience our own kind of emotional wear and tear. Every college application submitted, every late-night conversation, every college tour – it all leaves its mark on our hearts.

Some days, we’re running on full tread, confident and steady. Other days? We’re feeling a bit thin and worn, aren’t we?

When the technician suggested new tires, it reminded me how crucial self-care is during this transition. Just as we wouldn’t drive on bad tires, we can’t navigate this emotional journey on an empty tank. Maybe it’s time for that book club you’ve been putting off, or that morning walk you keep promising yourself. Whatever recharges your spirit or ignites a spark, that’s your new set of tires.

Self-care isn’t selfish – it’s as essential as those four new tires on my minivan!

Then the tech said sometime that really got my wheels turning (pun intended!) “New tires won’t help much if your alignment is off,” he said. 

In my head I was thinking – “YES! I couldn’t agree more!” Sometimes, just doing something new or going through the motions without much consideration is not enough – we need to make sure the intention behind what we are doing aligns with our values and with who we are becoming in this new season of parenting. As our kids find their alignment, we get to rediscover ours too..

How’s your alignment?

Think about it, when was the last time you checked your own alignment? Are you just going through the motions of preparing for your child’s departure, or are you truly preparing yourself for this new chapter? It’s not just about filling the void with activities; it’s about intentionally choosing what serves you, your growth as a parent in this next era and your well-being.

Maybe that means reaching out to an old friend, exploring new hobbies, or reimagining what your daily routine looks like with one less place setting at the dinner table. It’s about finding that sweet spot where self-care meets purpose. Even with new tires, my Odyssey would not run smoothly if it was out of alignment. 

The truth is, this parenting journey is a lot like maintaining a car – it needs regular check-ups, occasional adjustments, and sometimes, a complete refresh. And that’s okay. Actually, it’s more than okay, it’s necessary. Just as we wouldn’t ignore the warning signs on our dashboard, we shouldn’t ignore our emotional needs during this transition.

As you navigate this college transition, remember to check your own tread. How are you holding up? Are you taking care of yourself? And most importantly, are you aligned with where you want to go in this next chapter?

This phase of parenting is quite a wild ride! But with proper care and alignment, you can navigate it with presence, strength, and maybe even a bit of excitement for what lies ahead – both for our kids and for ourselves.

I definitely notice my car drives more smoothly since I changed the tires and checked the alignment.

Noted, Discount Tires!